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sábado, 1 de outubro de 2011

Thirthy-nine degrees to Fourty soon

I never said that I stopped believing in God, I just stopped thinking what people were telling me to think. So I think it's fair enough for me to ask Him for help and cease my little pain. And being very honest to myself, I'm afraid. Afraid to be asleep and don't wake up anymore, afraid of having something that any physician in the world couldn't heal, maybe I'm overreacting, maybe I'm just tired of this. I'm burning inside, literally. I can't stand it any longer and I felt like I wanted to pray again, but how? To whom? I was trained to look at the sky and pray, pray and pray. I looked at the sky (or the ceiling) but I felt nothing, I could just say "enough! Help me anyway and take this tough fever away". 
I slept, finally. But I got my alarm clock settled because I wanted to be sure I was alive. I don't know how I'm feeling right now, I don't know about tomorrow. Now I feel so weightless, maybe it's because I just feel as I'm numb. I'll try to get back to sleep, I'll try not to feel afraid anymore. And please, cease my burning.